Eyes Are Red and Tears Are Shed
by TheAddict4Dramatics
Summary: "I just wanted to see you. I wanted to see you as you know me completely and I know you. Is that too much to ask?""Apparently so..." She murmured. 11/River fluff. Full title inside. Note rating. Now complete.
1. Chapter 1

**11/River fluff set between the Weeping Angels and Silence in the Library but with a future doctor that has come back to surprise the 'new Professor' River Song. Title from lyrics to Boston by Augustana, I was listening to it earlier and thought it really fitted their relationship.**

**I might do a couple more chapters if people think so?**

**Please R+R **

Eyes Are Red and Tears are Shed, the Worlds You Must Have Crossed

Her voice sounded hollow and lifeless. Even to her it sounded dull. Professor Song was surprised she was holding the attention of any of the students; talking about the most exciting events in history and she could not muster a seed of enthusiasm. River turned to face the tiered rows of spectators that somehow, surprisingly still looked half engaged.

It wasn't that she didn't love her job because she did. After years of (almost) constant entrapment in Storm Cage the open space of the lecture hall gave her an indescribable feeling of freedom. The air almost felt physically lighter than her enclosed cell, somehow she could breathe easier. The young, brilliant minds she encountered gave her hope for the future, excited at what they could achieve and her part in helping them.

Yes she did love her job but it was just this day. This day reminded her of how alone she was. The doctor's visits were becoming few and far between and each time he knew her a little less. That light that burnt so brightly in his eyes when he looked at her was slowly dimming, being extinguished. One day there would be no light there at all, only confusion and the hell of un-recognition.

He had made River's past so rich and full and worthwhile. Her future was the opposite. A life without the Doctor, it would kill her.

As the lecture came to an end the students began to filter out until she believed she was alone. A figure approached her as she collected her things at the desk; his voice was unexpected and made her jump.

"Sorry Professor I just, I just wanted..." The young man faltered and looked rather guilty.

"It's fine Karl, go on."

/ / /

The Doctor watched from his seat in the top corner of the room as the nervous looking student babbled away and River did her best to look interested. She didn't look interested she looked tired, bored but mostly sad and that broke the Doctor's heart a little. He knew they were approaching the end of River's timeline, she was out of prison and a Professor now – that meant it was only a matter of time before the library. He tried not to think about that. That also meant they were at the beginning of his time with her so he wasn't _her _doctor yet. Looking back he regretted how he had treated her in the beginning, he was cold and she deserved anything but that. He didn't understand her, what she was then but he could still see what he was to her and that scared him beyond belief.

He wanted to make that a little better so he had turned up today, an older him, a him that knew River completely. He rose and descended the stairs.

"I'm flattered Karl, really, but I'm your teacher. That is all." River said through clenched teeth, she was trying her dam hardest at this nice, understanding role model persona but all she wanted to do was punch him the hell away from her.

"Professor..." He sneered and curved a hand over waist.

Right, enough with the accepting personality back to no nonsense River. She turned to smack him but was greeted with a whoosh of cold air. The Doctor removed Karl by the collar of his jacket and pushed him towards the direction of the door.

"I think you need to learn when a girl is saying no mate."

"And who the hell are you?" The student yelled, clearly disgruntled to be interrupted.

He is my husband; River thought and just caught it on the tip of her tongue before it spilled out. Careful, spoilers.

"I'm her husband."

River turned to him, a look of complete astonishment on her face. Had he read her thoughts? Or had she really said it out loud after all?

Karl mumbled something embarrassed and almost sprinted for the door.

"Doctor?"

He strode over to his wife and kissed her gently but passionately. It was her first kiss with him since he'd returned her to Storm Cage after Utah and it couldn't have been more different from that. There was no flailing this time just a subtle, strong certainty. River moaned, in complete bliss, she was sure that her previous kiss with the Doctor had been her last and thank God she was wrong.

He pulled away slowly.

"Hello, sweetie." He mocked lightly.

"You're the doctor?" She asked, still in complete shock.

"Nice to see you still remember me."

"You're _my_ doctor. Where are you from? How late are you?"

"Quite late. Late, late." He chirped. "Or early, in your case. You're young, still as insatiable and quite a bit more impressionable."

"And you're taking full advantage I'm sure." She smirked, his grip tightened on her waist as he leaned in to kiss her once more. She whispered into mouth, lips hovering over each other. "You're breaking the rules."

He pulled back slightly, frowning and replied:

"I just wanted to see you. I wanted to see you as you know me completely and I know you. Is that too much to ask?"

"Apparently so..." She murmured.

He kissed her again with a new found energy, invading her mouth with his tongue and burying his hands within the mass of curls that framed her face. He wanted to show her, tell her how much he loved her. Despite what an arse he was being each time he met her, he loved her.

The wood of the desk hit the back of thighs with a thud but he barely noticed as he led a trail of wet kisses along her collar bone. River guided his head with her hands, this felt good, she never thought she'd feel it again and it felt good.

"Sweetie, sw... oooh..." She moaned as he found the hollow space in between her collar bones and sucked it hard. "God that feels go... Doctor?" He rose his head and smirked at her lust filled eyes. "Maybe we should continue this in a nice comfy TARDIS somewhere?"

"She's parked out back. The whole of time and space, River, where d'ya fancy?" He grinned.

"Oooh surprise me!" She grabbed his hand and made a dash for the exit but he pulled her back, placing the lightest kiss on her forehead.

"Happy birthday Melody Pond." She grinned, so he did know. "Mels, Professor Song, River, my River..." He breathed out her names. "My wife."


	2. Chapter 2

**Hi, I don't know if anyone is still vaguely interested in this story but I posted the first chapter way back in September and the second chapter has been sitting on my computer half written ever since. For some reason the muse came back completely randomly tonight so I finished the chapter. I think I'm going to write another chapter after this as well.**

**If anyone is still out there please R+R. Thank you!**

Eyes are and Tears are Shed, the Worlds You Must Have Crossed

Chapter Two

"Right! Okay, okay, okay. First things first..."

The Doctor babbled excitedly as he fiddled with TARDIS, River stood in the doorway counting the mistakes he made with each turn of a knob and smiling knowingly to herself. He really did need to learn to fly the poor girl properly. The doctor turned to her.

"It's your birthday. We need birthday things, birthday cake, birthday presents, birthday treats!"

"Hmmm..." She sauntered over to him with that irresistible smirk on her face. "I fancy some birthday treats."

River half expected him to jump away as she wrapped her arms round him so closely they were touching top to toe. Recently any physical contact had ended in awkwardness and flailing, River wasn't so much hurt as amused; he had that gorgeous mixture of bliss and torture played out across his features. He was enjoying it but somehow thought he shouldn't be.

Yet today there was no flailing whatsoever as leant down to whisper, licking and biting gently at her earlobe as he did:

"Now how did I know that was going to be your first choice?"

An involuntary moan escaped from River as the surface of her skin erupted into tiny goose bumps that led an army of shivers down her spin. He pulled away and must have seen the slight surprise in her eyes as he asked with concern:

"What?"

"Nothing... I'm just not used to this you. I missed you, that's all. I missed this you."

He instantly felt guilty. It wasn't until recently when he had been seeing a lot more of the younger River that he understood the pain he must have caused on their first few encounters. Young River was nowhere near as cold and guarded as he had been with her, in fact she was a little too trusting, he worried and prayed that was only a quality she possessed with him. But when he looked into young River's eyes there was not the same knowing glow that was so tantalising.

"I'm sorry... I... I miss this you too."

She smiled and kissed him softly on the mouth.

"No mopping on my birthday. Come on, where are you taking me?"

"Right!" He sprung forth into action and turned his attention back to the TARDIS. "You need a nice frock to wear."

"Oddly I don't have one of those stored on my person at the moment."

"Ye of little faith Professor Song. There should be something in the bedroom that will service."

She raised an eyebrow before skipping towards the hidden room. River emerged many moments later wearing the same glamorous, charcoal grey dress and vibrant red shoes that she had so long ago, for her at least. Her hair and make-up seemingly magically styled that way too.

"Crash of the Byzantium, really?" The Doctor pouted and returned:

"What, I like the dress. Hell in high heels; fits you perfectly. Besides you weren't in it nearly long enough the last time."

"That was the last time I saw you, Byzantium, long time ago."

"Bet it's been longer for me!"

She walked over to him, embracing him from behind and burying her face in between his shoulder blades encased in tweed.

"This is exactly what I needed. This you. Thank you." She murmured into the material. He threaded his fingers through hers.

"Ditto." The TARDIS came to the familiar grinding, whirling stop as he once again refused to take the brakes off. He pulled her excitedly by the hand, rushing to the doorway. "Come on, we're here Song."

"Hang on," She stopped abruptly. "I'm going out in this and you're not even going to change?"

"This is the perfect ensemble, it goes with any occasion." She looked unconvinced and quite frankly pissed off. The Doctor had learnt many years ago that he could not win when she looked like that, she had steely determination just like her mother. "Fine, fine." He sulked like a small child. Throwing his signature tweed jacket on the ground like a spoiled brat, he pulled on a smart black replacement that had been hanging on the coat stand by the door. It did very little to change his appearance. "Happy now?"

"Oh ecstatic!" River mocked sarcastically.

They left the TARDIS. River gasped as she found herself on a bustling New York City street, if she had to take an educated guess she'd say mid 20th Century. Old fashioned cars zoomed past and the billboards were so vibrantly colourful they almost popped right out of their giant metal frames to meet her on the sidewalk. The air was thick with sooty smoke and it smelled of it too along with rich food and fresh laundry. The earth was gritty beneath her feet. She was alive.

River turned to face the Doctor; he had an annoyingly smug grin on his face.

"Nice move mister." She pushed his chest away in a devilishly flirty way and the Doctor had to close his eyes to regain some composure.

"Doctor," he corrected through gritted teeth. He opened his eyes to stare down at her; she was almost glowing with happiness. "New York, New York, 1949. All of the worlds in all of the galaxies over all time and space, not a single species in the entire universe has ever managed to create a bakery as good as the good ol' big apple." Silently she began to lean closer to him, either not having heard or more likely completely ignoring what he had just told her. "However it does close in approximately three minutes, should probably hurry." The spell was broken, River scowled.

"Says the time traveller!"

/ / /

The doctor marched on at a pace and River struggled to keep up in her blood red heels. He was carrying the perfectly square white box tied with a small, delicate TARDIS blue bow. The smell wafted in the wind, over the Doctor's shoulder hitting River with force. Licking her lips as she began salivate River paused and savoured the moment. New York, her husband and her birthday. Perfect. The Doctor had almost disappeared; she had to run to catch up.

"Please let me have a peek!" She whined.

"I told you not yet; it'll spoil your dinner."

"I'm practically starved, I've been teaching all day and I'm working on some field research for an expedition I was meaning to tell you actually, have you ever heard of the li..." She finally caught up, out of breath and reached for his elbow. The Doctor swung round, she stumbled backwards but his spare arm gripped around her back and he leaned in and kissed her roughly completely cutting her off. "And it smells soooo good..." she finished, panting slightly.

"Shut up." He dragged her along by the hand and she obeyed, following without a single word.

/ / /

New York he had promised and New York he had delivered. The club was spectacular; majestic dark mahogany wood covered every surface of the grand hall. A big band played in the corner whilst couples danced on the huge floor. The tables housed hand shined silver cutlery and pure silk table cloths. River was definitely not over dressed.

They had eaten probably the best food River had ever experienced. Danced half the night away and laughed the other half into her memory forever. The Doctor's moves were surprisingly tame, for him and now he sat smiling as he watched her dance with a lucky, select few. At one time it would have bothered him, her flirting and dancing with other men; the jealousy used to stab at his insides until his skin turned green. But this River especially was undeniably his. He liked that. Every pair of male eyes in the room were fixed on her and she would return to his table making him the envy and enemy of her admirers. They all wanted her and he had her. He shouldn't like that. It was such a human emotion: smugness. He shouldn't like that, kinda did a bit.

River interrupted his thoughts as she dropped herself down onto his lap. Hot from the dancing her skin was tinged with a subtle pink flush. The Doctor leaned forward and placed a light kiss on her exposed shoulder before pulling the dress back up to its correct place.

"Are you enjoying it?"

"You know I am. You've truly outdone yourself." She buried herself in his neck as his lips found her hair.

"You're certainly making friends."

"Jealous?"

"I know you'll come back to me." He felt her smile against his skin but she did not move.

"Young you is so jealous and possessive but you don't why you feel that way so you get all cross and moody. It's funny... and... sad... I like it when I'm dancing with someone else and I can feel you'll gaze on me, it's so strong it almost burns. But you don't come over, you don't do anything. You're thinking of what you're going to do to me later and how it doesn't matter who I'm dancing with because only you will get to do what you're imagining. So you let me have my fun and they all think that I'm walking all over you and straying in front of you. They think I get all excited because I'm with them or I'm misbehaving but it's because I know you're watching and I know you're thinking." He wrapped his fingers in her corkscrew curls, sighing heavily. "Younger you doesn't think any of that. Just thinks I'm easy..."

"No!" He objected as he pulled her head from under his chin. "I don't think that."

"You thought I was with Father Octavian." River grimaced and suddenly they were laughing at the ridiculousness of it all, their entire situation and their lives.

"Do you want to know what I was thinking whilst you were gyrating with the _Yankie banker_?" The Doctor did his best New York accent on the last words. River smiled and nodded. "That I really, really, really want some of that cake!"

River jumped up and held out her hand:

"Come on, I'm ready to go. I know this lovely little quite park somewhere."

They left joking and laughing, hand in hand passing the scowling banker that was nursing a scotch by the bar. The Doctor collected the pristine white box from the trusted doorman and they entered the New York night.

It was a mild April night; the pavements had that glorious post rain smell, indescribable but instantly recognisable. For the city that never sleeps the streets were surprising quiet as River led the Doctor. She skipped ahead humming the band tunes and repeating some of the little steps. He watched from behind unable to keep the grin from his face. This is how he wanted to remember her. It was getting close to the library now. She had almost mentioned it earlier but he had managed to cut her off. He simple couldn't bear to hear her speak of it with her passionate, breathy tone and eyes wide with excitement. He didn't want to remember her connected to that machine, crying as she realised this was his beginning so it had to be her end. When he thought of her he would think of the singing vision before him; heels long abandoned, flung over her shoulder as she pranced bare foot down post-war New York City at 3am.

Suddenly they were at the entrance to Central Park. The Doctor laughed aloud.

"Quiet park somewhere?"

"I'm sure we can find a secluded spot my love." She turned to him smiling but then stopped as she saw the look on his face. He was gazing at her deep in thought but his expression unreadable. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Melody Pond, child of the TARDIS. Look at you now. Look how wonderful you are."

She simply smiled and walked into the park. He waited a moment and began to follow as he always did.


	3. Chapter 3

**Thanks to **_**red92 **_**and **_**cmartlover **_**for their lovely reviews of chapter two and for anyone else who hasn't completely given up on this story. One more chapter to go after this.**

**The quote here is said by Idris in **_**The Doctor's Wife. **_

**Please R+R. **

Eyes are Red and Tears are Shed, The Worlds You Must Have Crossed

Chapter Three

They found their secluded spot, surrounded by foliage that gave them perfect privacy. The park was fairly quiet anyway expect a few unfortunate people that had found their bench for the night and others stumbling home. A dim street light flickered above and cast exaggerated shadows around them. The Doctor pulled a red rug from the bottom of the box, River smirked:

"You're full of surprises tonight."

"I imagined you wouldn't be keen on ruining your expensive frock."

He laid it out and they sat. Once the box had been placed in front of her River sat crossed legged, leaning so far forward she was almost toppling over. She looked ridiculous in this position, the slit in her dress left the material pooling either side of her and not covering things that probably should very well be covered in a public place. The Doctor's eyes lingered on the expanse of creamy, smooth thigh that was being tilted towards him as she became restless. He was salivating too but probably for entirely different reasons to River.

"Come on already!" She moaned, her tone taking on the persona of a whining child.

He grinned and flipped the lid open. Inside the clean white icing matched the pristine box. It was unyieldingly smooth across the delicious sponge beneath. Hand-made, delicate, editable roses were scattered around the outside, TARDIS blue of course. As was the slanted scrawl across the top: _Next Stop Everywhere._ Her hand reached out and hovered over the writing as if the meaning would float up into her fingertips.

"Spoilers." The Doctor whispered. She continued to gaze down masterpiece below. "Well don't just look at it! It's lemon drizzle sponge, your favourite and the icing..." He ran his index finger along the circular curve until it was completely covered in what could have been snow. "...is sweetest..." He moved his finger toward River. "...thickest..." She took his finger in her mouth, running her tongue along the underneath and sucking the contents off the tip. "...marzipan." The Doctor's voice was strained as her tongue expertly caressed him.

"Hmm! God that's good!"

"I know." He smiled looking smug.

"Do you want some?" He nodded. She climbed onto his lap, her bare thigh brushing against his growing arousal. He groaned and closed his eyes trying to think devilishly unattractive things but all he could feel, hear and smell was his wife leaning over him. "There's some right here." She indicated to the tiniest pure white stain adorning the left of her lower lip.

"So there is."

At the last second she turned her head a fraction and his lips collided full on with hers. She tasted of that delectable cake mixed with her own unique flavour: like time and adventure and sin. The Doctor thought he may physically explode. This woman was entirely too much for him and he really shouldn't like that but he definitely did, more than a bit. When he thought of her he would see her skipping down the street at 3am but he would taste this irresistible mix.

River felt his arousal pressing into her hip and smiled from ear to ear. It always made her ecstatically happy that he wanted her. He could any woman he chose; they would all gladly follow him into his TARDIS and into his bedroom. Some would downright kill for the opportunity. But he chose her. He married her. River laid an opened mouth kiss on the pulse point in his neck as she reached for his trousers.

"Whoaah..." He removed her hand just before it curled under his waist band. "At least have a slice first you insatiable harlot." He joked and she smirked.

Half of him wanted to scream at himself for being so stupid. He was physically aching for the touch he had just pushed away. But the rational half had won. This was one of the last times he would ever see her. They were more linear now that perhaps they ever had been or ever will be. Expect _Darillium. _A shot of ice ran through him with the thought alone. He tried to shake it off. No, he had probably ripped a hole in the universe to be here, he was going to make it last.

"And what am I supposed to use cut said slice sweetie? I don't think the sharpness of your wit alone is going to do it."

"Bugger!" He cursed. She was about to laugh until she saw how genuinely angry he was. He lifted her off of his lap and went to close the box. "Stupid idiot!"

"Hang on." River was worried. She'd seen him angry plenty of times but when one of his friends was in danger, when some evil had come to threaten innocence. Never over something so... trivial. "What's up with you?" She tried to sound cheerful but her voice was tight.

"It was supposed to be perfect." One last birthday with a husband that actually knew who she was, in one of the most romantic cities, eating wonderful cake by moonlight and he'd screwed it all up.

"It _is_ perfect." She skimmed the outside of the cake and offered her frosting covered finger to him. "Now we just have to use our fingers..." He continued to look serious despite her teasing face. "Trust me it's better this way." After what felt like an eternity he yielded and took the icing from her finger. "Better?" Her tone was mocking but only slightly.

"It has its upside."

His schoolboy pout soon turned into a mischievous grin as picked a chunk from the cake and extended it to River. She smiled, knowing she had avoided an unnecessary tantrum, for someone so old he really did act like he was still pubescent. She leant forward to eat the cake but he jerked his hand smearing it all over her cheek. River gasped in genuine surprise. He was going to pay for that. She lunged forward pinning him to the ground beneath her and rubbed her face along his until he was equally sticking with glorious mess. The Doctor's hearty laugh was contagious and soon she was joining in. To anyone walking past they sounded like naughty school kids that had snuck out from under their parents' watchful eye to explore their new found sexuality. The truth couldn't be further from it but in that moment River felt exactly like that giddy schoolgirl completely dazzled by her love. He licked and ate the cake from her face with no inhibitions whatsoever. It tasted like creamy perfection on her skin.

"The sponge is excellent you should really try som..."

She cut him off a kiss full of heat and passion. As her tongue danced with his in a way that was so familiar but it seemed an age since she'd felt it. The feeling made her ache all over, instantly drenched. His hands found her hips and gripped so hard they were sure to leave marks. She hoped they did, that he left her with something after he had gone. When she pulled back they were both panting.

He gazed up at her trying to store every intricate detail of each individual feature into his memory. Soon this is all he would have left and when he closed his eyes he didn't want some shady half memory but a labyrinth of depth and aspect. She went to move off of him but he kept her fixed astride him, nails digging through the thin material of her dress leaving scratch marks.

"Sweetie?" He didn't respond but his grip loosened somewhat, confident she wasn't going to abandon him. "You are in the oddest mood tonight." His hand dipped under the slit in her dress and began to caress her thigh; coherent thoughts were dripping out her brain by the nanosecond. "Mmm... sweetie whilst I remember... can you... uh!" He found the edge of her French lace underwear and toyed with the hem. "Oooh... can you drop me off the same day you picked me up this time?"

His fingers danced their way over the top the expensive material and her skin erupted in goose bumps.

"Why?"

"I've...Hmm..." She let out a breathy laugh, arching her back as he continued his feather light exploration. "I've got a meeting tomorrow morning... ooh... very important... Can't, ah! Can't miss it."

Suddenly the Doctor stilled his movements; River's eyes snapped open, instantly missing his touch.

"What is it?"

"About that expedition you were talking about?" He already knew the answer.

"Yeah. We're going to the Library. A whole planet full of books, can you imagine? Have you been?" The excitement was in her eyes and voice just as he knew he would be and he had to close his eyes or he knew he would cry.

"Once." He ground out.

"Well it's been empty for 100 years. One day something just took them all, everyone that was there and no-one has been back since. Until now. God it's exciting!"

He took his hand out of her dress at the speed of light as if it were on fire. She whined at the loss of contact. His eyes still closed:

"When do you go?"

"We set off next week."

Less than a week before she would begin her journey to death.

The Doctor flipped her over instantly and pinned her to the ground, towering over her almost crushing her with his weight. She yelped in both surprise and pain. Securing each knee beside her he trapped her in-between. In a frenzied hurry he threw off his jacket, tore free his braces and yanked down his trousers and boxers.

"Doctor..."

He did not even remove her underwear, simply shoved them to one side as he entered her with a rough, fluid motion.

/ / /

Afterwards the Doctor stood and dressed himself. River remained on lying on the blanket, one hand gripping her own hair as she tried to regain a normal breathing pattern.

"God. So that's what you were thinking when I was dancing with that banker earlier? I wished you would have interrupted."

Her tone was light and flirty, the Doctor felt anything but. He'd never been that rough before and now he felt slightly sick. He thought he could pound the inevitable out of her. He kept on getting deeper and deeper into her as if somehow the more they were connected the harder it would be for the universe to separate them, as it would, so soon from now.

He turned to look at her. Even in the moonlight he could dark areas on her skin, on her shoulders where he'd pinned her down, on her legs – the outskirts of his main attack. It seemed everywhere he looked there were bruises already forming. There was a cut on her lip, where previously the innocent white stain of icing had sat but now it was tainted with wicked red. _Biting is excellent. It's just like kissing only there is a winner._ That's what Idris had said. He had won. And look at his victim.

The Doctor kicked the box as fury erupted within him. It went flying and landed several feet away. The cake abandoned its ship, scattered across the lawn, ruined. River looked on wide eyed.

"I'm sorry. It's just this, us, our shitty situation. It's not fair."

"I wouldn't have it any other way." She whispered and he could tell she was crying without turning to look at her.

"I would."

River struggled to get to her feet, sore from their recent pursuits. As she wrapped her arms around his back he flinched and she tried to ignore it.

"Then how would you have it? Marriage and a moderate mortgage on three-bed semi-detached in Ledworth. It would drive you insane."

"And this doesn't." He turned to face her and spoke utterly heart-broken: "I hurt you."

"Come on, you know us prison girls. Partial to bit of rough..."

"Don't." He warned. "Don't make yourself that so I feel better about myself."

"You didn't exactly escape unscathed my love." She stroked one of the many scratches on his face and neck.

He gazed at her as if he was about to say something of great importance, instead he murmured:

"I should get you home. Don't want to miss the big meeting."

For the life of her she could not work out why he sounded so bitter.


	4. Chapter 4

**Last chapter! Thanks once again for everyone that has read/supported/reviewed this story. I thought the last chapter got a bit angsty as this was supposed to be a light-hearted fic so this chapter is back to fluffyness.**

**Please R+R.**

Eyes Are Red and Tears Are Shed, The World's You Must Have Crossed

Chapter Four

They travelled back in stony silence. He landed the TARDIS in the normal noisy way and she opened her mouth to utter some witty retort but shut it again. She found herself in her garden, the depressing dark house stood ominously in front of her. It was late evening and the sleepy village was soundless and calm. Soon she would be alone again.

"It's the same day as I picked you up... just."

"Thank you," She turned to him, he would not meet her eye. "You coming in?"

"I should get back."

"New companion to pick up I suppose... I take it mum and dad have already..." He begged her not to finish the sentence, he couldn't think about them tonight on top on everything else.

"Yes." He answered before she could continue. "I'm on my own for a bit."

"Right. Well thank you for a wonderful day." She was trying too hard to sound cheerful instead she sounded annoyingly and falsely pleasant.

River stood on her tiptoes and kissed him on the cheek. He stiffened and once again she tried and failed to ignore it. As she turned to leave he grabbed her wrist. He looked as shocked as she was at the movement; his reflex had acted of its own accord.

"Why don't you hate me?" His voice was stiff. "All the things I've done to you; your childhood stolen, your best days in prison, everyone thinking you're a murderer. You should really hate me."

"I thought we weren't mopping on my birthday."

She sounded light-hearted but he could see the tears in her eyes, she was trying so hard not cry, threatening them to fall. He reached out and drew her into his arms kissing her temple as it passed his lips.

"I'm sorry." He whispered into her hair. "I'm a class A fool. I've ruined your birthday... I wanted it to be perfect."

"Why do you keep saying that? Why does today have to be so much more perfect than the rest?"

Because it is the last one he answered inside his head. Because you are perfect and for once he wanted to reflect that. Because I love you. But he could never tell her that.

"Can we pretend the last half hour didn't happen?" He felt all the tension drain from her body as she nodded.

She pulled away smiling and led him by the hand.

"Come on, you owe me cake."

As they walked hand in hand along the silent street River shivered suddenly cold in spring night with nothing but a thin layer of lace covering most of her body. The Doctor sheltered her in his jacket and threw an arm around her. She fitted into his side perfectly. River smiled as she looked up at him, the night really had been perfect. Fair enough there had been some wobbles but it wouldn't be them if there wasn't. And the somewhat rough coupling that he thought was disastrous she considered wonderful. She couldn't remember ever coming so hard in her life. She reddened at the thought.

"I'd have never pictured in some place so..." The Doctor trailed off, looking around the quiet country surroundings for linguistic inspiration. "...peaceful I suppose..."

"Storm Cage was so very _un_peaceful; the alarms, the constant thunder... I just wanted somewhere quiet. I'm hardly ever here what with teaching and field work and madmen in blue boxes that keep turning up on my doorstep..."

"I've told you, you need to watch out for those!" River laughed and he kissed the top of her head, squeezing her even closer into him until they looked as if they were one. "So where in this lovely little village are we going to find cake at 12am?"

"It might not be New York but there's a half decent cafe just down the road."

"Open at this hour?"

"Darling who said anything about open?"

"_River_..." He growled in warning but she was already running ahead, her giggle echoing in the soundless rural surroundings.

The street had barely any lights and soon she had disappeared into the darkness. After a few steps he almost tripped over one of her blood red heels lying in the middle of the road. Frowning he picked it up and called her name. No reply. He continued holding the shoe in one hand until he came across its pair lying in an identical fashion a few feet further on. She was leaving him a trail ... of clothes. So he could soon add breaking and entering, robbery and indecent exposure to his list of criminal activities he'd engaged in this evening. Not to mention the acts committed in Central Park that weren't just illegal but downright sinful. And people accused him of being a bad influence. River Song his bad, bad girl. All his. His wife.

The next item he collected was his own jacket, still warm. Then he reached a crossroads and was unsure of whether to turn left or right. To the right under the direct glare of a rare streetlight was the next piece of her clothing. A small scrap of lace. His mouth went dry. As he picked it up he realised it was still wet; it could have been hers or his own desire that had spilled onto her underwear but for some reason the idea that is was a mixture of the two made him tingle all over.

"River?" He chocked. From a couple of doorways down she shushed him. She was crouched on the floor unpicking the lock with a hairpin. The rest of her attire still remaining intact on her body and the Doctor would be lying if he said he wasn't at least a little disappointed. "You can pick locks? Why aren't I surprised?"

"Oh Sweetie this is escapee skill number one. Kovarian was nothing if not thorough... gotcha!" She stood and opened the door with a smug smile. The smile soon dropped from her face as they stepped over the threshold and a loud siren began to wail. River turned to him, her eyes wide in surprise: "Shit!"

"What do we do now?" He hissed.

"Grab a bakewell tart and run!"

/ / /

River doubled over still giggling hysterically and taking rasping breaths of air. One hand held her stolen pastry, the other clutching the stitch in her side. She was gasping with the combined effort of sprinting and howling with laughter. River felt a hand on her arm spin her round as the Doctor kissed her firmly but softly. She beamed up at him. As the first rumble of thunder started above she threw her head back to look at the cloudy sky. The Doctor took full advantage of her exposed neck by placing a solitary concrete kiss at its centre. She looked back down and burst out in a fresh wave of laughter:

"Where's your cake?"

"I didn't have any hands left!" He held her shoes in one and his jacket in the other, her underwear sticking out of the pocket of his trousers.

She stood on tiptoes, having to stretch even further than usual as she was currently shoeless. Her lips hovered over his:

"Well maybe if you're nice I'll let you share." He kissed her again.

"Thank you."

/ / /

By the time they had reached her house the cake had been devoured and the heavens had opened. They took cover under her porch. Once again they resembled love crazy teenagers kissing in the pouring rain like they were acting a scene of an awful rom-com. River wished the day didn't have to end.

"I should give you back the dress. Might need it next time I visit." She turned her back to him. "Can you give me a hand?"

He placed the shoes and jacket on her dry porch and torturously slowly unzipped the back of her dress. The newly exposed skin exploded in goose bumps as the chill of the wet night hit it. The Doctor ran a hand down her bare back trying to warm her but it made her shiver all the more. She turned, her gaze fixed on his face and she slipped the dress from her shoulders and let it fall to the ground. She wore a strapless black corset and nothing else. Suddenly the underwear was burning a hole in his pocket, scolding his leg.

"Do you still have to rush off?"

"No."

They entered the house, the clothes forgotten on the doorstep.

/ / /

Weeks later he found them.

He was in the console room talking so quickly he was babbling like a brook, explaining some excitingly fascinating, monumental event to his new, young companion. He danced and whirled around the controls; his enthusiasm infectious. The new companion was still in that brilliant stage where everything was brand new and met with wide-eyed amazement. Her innocence still breath-taking.

He was admiring her inexperience, looking over his shoulder at her as he ran around the circular station. He wasn't looking where he was going so he tripped and stumbled and they fell to the ground.

He hadn't stopped since he last saw River. Adventure after adventure, breaking in the new girl. He hadn't slept, he hadn't changed. They were still in his pocket.

"Is that underwear?" The companion asked, startled.

Buggar. How to explain to that?

"Ermm... no... no... that's..." He snatched them and stuffed back into his pocket before she could examine them any further. "...nothing. That's nothing."

She looked like she didn't buy it but shrugged and wandered away regardless. Once he was alone he took them out again and examined the lace in his hand. He held them to his nose; if he closed his eyes he could imagine River was standing in front of him. And suddenly there were tears in his eyes.

"We did run, didn't we?" He whispered into the thin material.

"Doctor?"

He opened his eyes but it was not River standing in front of him.

"Are you okay?"

The Doctor tucked them away, in the inside of his tweed jacket, next to his pounding hearts.

"I'm perfect. Now where was I?"


End file.
